Mara Fisher, LCSW, MCC

Article:

How To Recognize What Your Life Values Are

What are values? How do they affect our lives? How do we figure out what ours are? Lately, both clients and friends seem to be in a quandary to understand what values are and what their individual life values are. What is humming through the air is a desire for an understanding as to what life values are.

Let' s begin here; to value something means that you place importance upon it. Life values are at the core of who you are. If you are feeling good about your life the chances are pretty good that you are living within your values. If you are feeling a negative emotion such as guilt, then you are probably living outside of your value system.

Now let's take a look at how to clarify the concept of values.

There are different types of values. Those that we move towards and those that we move away from. Away-from Values are emotions that we wish to avoid. Toward Values are emotions that we enjoy, that give us pleasure.

Examples of Toward Values:

Fun
Comfort
Creativity

Adventure
Happiness
Freedom

Success
Love
Security

Health
Learning
Intimacy

Honesty
Passion
Power

Examples of Away Values

Rejection
Frustration
Loneliness
Guilt

It is important to know what your values are, and that your away-from values do not conflict with your moving-toward values before setting goals for yourself. If, for instance, you have an away-from value of Rejection and a moving-toward value of Love in your #1 value spot, the chances are pretty good that you will not achieve the goal of a Loving Relationship as you will be too frightened of Rejection to allow another person to get close.

Here are some thoughts to consider as you are discovering what your values are.

What is most important to me in my life? The answers to this question are your Values.
Make a list of your 5 Toward Values in order of their importance to you.
Make a list of your 5 Away Values in order of their importance to you.
Now ask yourself if you are living in your values?
If you are not, ask yourself what you are willing to change so that you are living within your values.

For more information contact the author, life coach & licensed counselor,
Mara Fisher, LCSW, MCC at www.BridgeofLife.com